Anxiety That Won’t Go Away
You’ve tried deep breathing. Meditation. Journaling. Positive thinking.
And yet, the anxiety keeps coming back.
You might find yourself overthinking conversations, worrying about what could go wrong, second-guessing your decisions, or constantly trying to anticipate what other people might need from you.
Maybe you know logically that you’re safe, but your body doesn’t seem to believe it.
And you’re tired.
You want to feel calm. You want to trust yourself. You want to be able to enjoy your life without constantly waiting for something to go wrong.
Does this sound familiar?
You might be experiencing anxiety if you…
Overthink conversations long after they’ve happened
Constantly worry about what might go wrong
Find yourself constantly monitoring other people’s moods
Have difficulty relaxing, even when everything seems okay
Feel like your mind is always searching for the next problem
Experience racing thoughts, restlessness, muscle tension, or a feeling of being “on edge”
Know you’re safe logically, but still feel anxious in your body
What if your anxiety is trying to protect you?
Sometimes anxiety isn’t the problem. Sometimes, it’s a protective response.
There may be a part of you that believes if you think through every possible outcome, you can prevent something bad from happening.
Maybe you learned to pay close attention to other people’s moods so you could anticipate conflict. Maybe a part of you believes that if you do everything perfectly, you’ll finally feel safe, accepted, or worthy.
These patterns often develop for a reason. Difficult relationships, trauma, chronic stress, and other experiences can teach our minds and bodies to stay alert—even when we’re no longer in the situation that created the need for that protection.
So instead of asking, “How do I get rid of my anxiety?” we can begin asking:
“What is my anxiety trying to protect me from?”
Let’s get curious about your anxiety…
This is one of the principles I use in Internal Family Systems (IFS) therapy.
Rather than judging or fighting the anxious parts of you, we can approach them with curiosity and compassion.
You may have a worried part that is constantly preparing for what could go wrong, a perfectionist part that fears making mistakes, a people-pleasing part that focuses on everyone else’s needs, or a hypervigilant part that is always scanning for signs that something might be wrong.
These parts aren’t bad. They’re trying to help.
Together, we can explore what these parts are afraid would happen if they stopped working so hard—and whether they still need to protect you in the same way today.
Anxiety isn’t just in your mind
Anxiety can also live in your body.
You may experience a racing heart, tight chest, muscle tension, an unsettled stomach, restlessness, clenched jaw, or a feeling that you can never fully relax.
This is why my approach incorporates somatic-based interventions alongside IFS and other trauma-informed approaches. We’ll pay attention not only to your thoughts and emotions, but also to what’s happening in your body.
Sometimes anxiety is about more than what’s happening right now
Your current anxiety may be connected to experiences from much earlier in your life.
Perhaps you grew up in an environment where you had to monitor other people’s emotions. Maybe you learned that making mistakes wasn’t safe, that your needs came second, or that you couldn’t fully let your guard down.
These experiences can shape the way you relate to yourself and others and influence what you believe about safety, trust, relationships, and your own worth.
Sometimes what helped you cope in the past is what is keeping you stuck today.
Therapy can give you an opportunity to understand those patterns and begin responding to yourself differently.
What if you could trust yourself again?
The goal isn’t necessarily to never feel anxious again. Anxiety is a normal human emotion.
Instead, we can work toward understanding your anxiety and developing a different relationship with it.
Imagine being able to:
Make decisions without endlessly second-guessing yourself
Tolerate uncertainty without immediately assuming the worst
Set boundaries without overwhelming guilt
Recognize when an old pattern has been activated
Feel more grounded in your body
Respond to yourself with compassion instead of criticism
Feel more secure in your relationships
Move through anxious moments without allowing anxiety to run the show
You don’t have to become someone who never feels anxious.
You can become someone who understands yourself well enough that anxiety doesn’t have to make every decision for you.
My approach to anxiety therapy
I offer a holistic, trauma-informed approach that goes beyond traditional talk therapy. Depending on your needs, we may incorporate:
Internal Family Systems (IFS)
Exploring the protective parts behind anxiety, overthinking, perfectionism, people-pleasing, and self-criticism.
Somatic-based interventions
Building awareness of what is happening in your body and developing a greater sense of safety and regulation.
Attachment-based therapy
Exploring how early relationships may have shaped your beliefs about safety, trust, connection, and your own worth.
EMDR
When appropriate, processing experiences that continue to affect you in the present.
What does anxiety therapy look like?
I use a 3-stage, trauma-informed approach to therapy.
Stage 1: Safety-building
We’ll focus on coping skills, emotional awareness, and getting to know the different parts of you.
Stage 2: Processing
When you’re ready, we may use IFS, EMDR, somatic-based interventions, attachment-based therapy, or a combination of approaches to explore old patterns and difficult experiences.
Stage 3: Integration
We’ll focus on integrating what you’ve learned, reconnecting with your sense of self, and creating a life that reflects who you are now.
You don’t have to figure it all out alone
Maybe you’ve spent years trying to understand your anxiety. You’ve tried to think your way out of it, control it, or ignore it.
But if your anxiety keeps coming back, that doesn’t mean you’re failing.
It may mean there’s something underneath the anxiety that deserves your attention.
Together, we can slow things down, become curious about what’s happening beneath the surface, and work with the parts of you that have been trying so hard to keep you safe.
You are not your anxiety.
And you don’t have to get rid of parts of yourself to heal.
If you’re ready to explore what may be underneath your anxiety, I’d love to connect.